My sentiments exactly.

Last weekend I went to see This Means War (Reese Witherspoon, Chris Pine, Tom Hardy). You know? That spy-meets-spy as we vie over the too-hot-for-her-own-good Witherspoon?

Before seeing the movie, I was well aware of the battle over the movie’s R-rating. (Just before its release, Fox got its PG-13 rating.) I fully expected some gnarly sexual innuendos from Chelsea Handler’s corner. Instead, what I got were a handful of penis jokes and a (barely) scantily clad Handler atop her boxer-wearing hubby (eating Cheetos, of course).

Fox “cut a few racy jokes from Handler” to get its PG-13 rating. [x] Here’s what I don’t get: Why does America (and Hollywood, by association) have such an infatuation with sheltering minors from sex, and NOT violence? Obviously, America’s obsession with sex and human rights is so intertwined with religion and politics that I can’t even begin to broach that subject.

Instead, here are some movies that are PG-13 but should be rated-R:

Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981): This movie includes Nazis, ripped to shreds by airplane propellers, gruesome head-shots, and even exploding heads.

Poltergeist (1982): Featuring murderous clowns who will literally tear you from your bed and rip your face off in the middle of the night.

The Sixth Sense (1999): A movie about dead people. Young Mischa Barton’s character is case and point why this movie should have been rated-R.

Water for Elephants (2010): The beating of the elephant. Because Hollywood could give two shits about faux animal violence.

Blade: Trinity (2004): Vampire and human gore…everywherrrre.

And here are some movies that are R-rated BECAUSE OF SEX/DRUGS:

American Beauty (1999): Boobs. The end.

Babel (2006): A 12-year-old is shown masturbating.

Wonder Boys (2000): Given the R-rating because of “some drug use.” Seriously.

Love and Other Drugs (2010): Heaven forbid…there was a sex scene and Anne Hathaway showed her boob during a medical physical!

These lists could have been made so much longer, but these movies get the point across.

Would you rather have your teen engaging in a healthy, safe sex life or beating the shit out of some kid (or worse)?

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